Eye See You: The Last Days of Janelle pt. 16

She had smiled at him.

All Amy had incur the man’s wrath was smile at him.

I watch the memory, his thoughts audible to my ears.

He was in the elevator.

She entered.

She looked at him, and smiled.

It was nothing special, no grand gesture. It was just her being polite to a neighbor.

To him, it was an act of violence.

“Say something…”

“Why won’t you say something?”

“What a tease.”

“She’s taunting me!”

“She’s mocking me!”

“That bitch!”

“That whore!”

“She knows… she knows…”

“She’s next.”

His words are like sonic booms in my ears.

His anger is uncontrollable.

Even though I can no longer be harmed, I’m afraid.

One simple, polite gesture sealed her fate.

Ruins pt. 18

The darkness is complete and absolute. 

I keep moving forward, at least I think I am. 

I can’t see Nora, but I can feel her weight in my arms.

I can hear the others, yelling for each other.

I fumble with my bag, finding a flashlight I had grabbed back at the department store. I hit the switch.

It still works.

The darkness is like smoke, swirling and swallowing the beam of the light in front of me. 

Things are moving around me.  I can’t see them. 

I keep moving forward.  I have no choice.

I find the wall, and use it as my guide.  It grounds me, gives me a way to move. 

I hear a low growl, and I freeze. 

My breath catches in my throat. 

I see a face in front of me, twisted and demonic. It smiles.

“Deus occultus!”

It’s voice is a shriek.

It watches me for a moment, and then it’s gone, and I’m running even faster.

Eye See You: The Last Days of Janelle pt. 15

I stay in his mind.

As much as it sickens me to be close to him, to feel what he feels, I am intrigued by him.

He is human, but lacks humanity. While he feels emotions, they are almost alien in their intensity, and it is shocking how limited they truly are.

Anger.

Hatred.

Envy.

Lust.

Oh, lust is the worst.

It burns in him. It is not a yearning for a companion, but a quest for physical satisfaction. He does not want a lover, but a living, breathing sex toy that he can use at his will.

His fantasies are horrifying, crude and cruel.

Women, men… it doesn’t matter.

All that matters is that they suffer at his hand.

All that matters is that he can control them.

Dominate them.

There are two girls in particular that he seems to fixate on.

He never speaks to them, but watches.

He hates them, but he wants them.

Amy and Dina.

One of them looked familiar.

Amy.

I had seen her picture, read her name.

She was on the list.

She was in the game.

If he wanted her so badly, why would he give her a death sentence?

Letters from the Dead pt. 37

I had called Leah after leaving the hospital.

I just didn’t want to be alone.

Was I going to turn out like Sebastian?

Before I had left Sebastian had hugged me, telling me that he and Tommy were going to run away together.

Maybe that was what I should do. 

Maybe I should just run.

Fuck getting to the bottom of this whole shit storm.

I should just hop in my car and go.

I knew it wouldn’t matter.

Stuff like this never stopped because a geographical change.

I had no choice.

I just needed a bottle of wine, and a chance to talk to someone else, someone outside of all of this.

When I got home Leah was waiting for me in my driveway.

Letters from the Dead pt. 36

I played along. 

What other option did I have?

I sat by Sebastian’s bedside, his bandaged hand clutching mine. 

“You can’t tell anyone this, Miss Williams, but…”

He paused, looking at the door, and then leaning in he began to whisper softly to me.

“Tommy and I are in love.” 

I noticed that his eyes never seemed to focus. 

They almost seemed to be vibrating in his skull, darting quickly from side to side.

“That’s good Sebastian.”

I patted his hand.

“I’m glad you feel comfortable enough to tell me something so important to you.”

“I screwed up. I got scared, and I screwed up.  I… cheated.”

He shook his head.

“I thought Tommy had left me for good. I wouldn’t blame him, but…”

He took in a deep breath.

“He’s coming back.” 

His smile made my heart break.

All the pain and the guilt had done it.

They managed to crush him.

At least he was smiling.

I kept telling that to myself, over and over again, to keep the tears at bay.